"When I am losing and playing really poorly, I don't really care I'm just a bit defeated": Callan Rydz makes admission that darting desire has gone

Although the darts world knows him primarily for his explosive scoring power and emotional presence on stage, it was a relaxed and candid Callan Rydz who reflected on a turbulent period while out on the golf course.

Before the conversation turned to darts, attention first shifted to his other great passion: golf. Rydz had already played a round the day before and was looking forward to the charity event.

"Yeah, I mean I was out with Tom Sykes and his manager yesterday and just played nine holes. It's a lovely course and played really well, so it'll be a good day out on a good course," he said to Online Darts.

Golf has become increasingly popular among darts players in recent years. Players such as Michael Smith, Nathan Aspinall and many others can regularly be found on the course. For Rydz, it provides a welcome distraction.

"A few lads I know back home, Gav and Kev, got me to join a golf society and it's been great. Getting out with the lads once a month helps you get away from the darts. Especially at the minute, because I'm not having a good time with the darts."

It's no secret that Rydz has been struggling for form. The Englishman has produced inconsistent results over the past few seasons and has yet to rediscover the level that previously made him such a threat on the ProTour and in major televised events.

Asked how difficult this period has been, he gave an honest reply about his current plight. Albeit upbeat to start with but he did months back open up about the abuse he suffered.

"It's happened every year. I've always gone through spells where I've played poorly, but I know it'll come back. It's just a matter of when."

"I think the toughest part is that when I am losing and playing really poorly, I don't really care. I'm just a bit defeated. I used to be a bit of a hothead - slamming stuff, swearing, telling people to do one. Now I'm just not bothered, which is obviously the wrong attitude to have. But I'll get that fire back in my belly.

Behind his struggles on the oche lies a much deeper reason. Rydz recently lost his grandfather, a life-changing event that has had a profound impact on him.

The subject was already touched upon during the recent World Championship. After one of his matches, close friend Josh Rock publicly spoke about the difficult period Rydz was experiencing and he still gives Rock all the love for doing what he did that night to support him.

"Obviously at the World's against Josh Rock, I didn't really want to play. I didn't want to go down there. I only went because I'm not financially secure enough not to. Otherwise, I probably wouldn't have gone.

"I tried my best and Josh was really respectful afterwards as well. I've got to give him so much credit for that because he didn't have to say what he said. Me and Josh are really good friends and we message each other quite a bit, so what he said was nice. All the family loved it and they were glad I went down. I didn't really want to, but I tried my best."

The loss of his grandfather remains something he feels every day. The emotional impact has affected both his game and his mental state. Even so, Rydz remains convinced that he will come through it.

"I started the year okay, probably because I wasn't thinking about it too much. But now, when I go to my mam's house, my grandad's house is on the same street. I don't really go into the house anymore. I used to go there every day to see him.

"Now I just look at a house where I've spent so much of my life. My uncle lives there now, but I don't really go in or speak to him much. So it is weird. But like I say, I'll get through this dark patch and hopefully the best version of me will be back."

But despite wrangling with those problems off the oche, Rydz has the belief that he can get back to his best and that there are encouraging signs amid his lack of desire right now "When I was winning things, I don't think I was actually playing particularly brilliantly. I'd definitely say that two years ago I was averaging 105-plus a lot more often than I ever was when I was winning titles, and I never won anything.

"I made a final and lost to Michael Smith when I was playing really well. That was one of the times when I thought I was going to kick on, but I didn't. That was my own fault.

"I've said this to a few of the lads - I got up into the high 20s in the world rankings without really practising, and now that I haven't been putting the time in, it's kind of catching up with me. It's up to me to go home, put more hours in, start playing more competitions back home and get that match practice back up."

A lot of players perhaps don't have the answers when they are struggling but for Rydz, he said he does it is just about putting it into action now.

"I know the game's there and I know I'm talented enough. I'm not trying to blow my own trumpet, but I know my game is up there with the very best.

"Consistency-wise, I'm not at that level at the minute, but I know I can average 110, 115. I've done it on the ProTour before. It's just about getting it back again."